How can you get someone to stop being lazy and "relaxing" ALL day?
Answer:
it is basically down to them to not be lazy etc etc but you can say that you are not tolerating it anymore. this would depend if you are talking about an adult or child or if its something effecting your personal life or work life. if you give a little more detail it would great help. thanks
someone is either lazy or they are not,it would be very hard to change semeones nature,good luck!
first figure out some sort of sport or phyiscal activity you would like to do and try to do it every day. for example go to the gym every moring. also if you dont have a job go out and look for one
Help them by giving them something to do. They need encouragement. They need hope to know that there is something to look forward for.
you said this person is lazy, and likes to "relax." as someone once accused of this, i simply didnt like being "harassed," (my take on the situation). all i am saying is that there are two sides to every story, and i became defensive with this person. it wasnt that i didnt want to do things, but i didnt want to be "told" to do them. try talking to that person in a non-confrontational manner, expressing your feelings, and trying to engage them, so you can work out a compromise. if you are willing, here's an outline for interpersonal effectiveness:
D escribe the situation, stick to the facts and no judgemental statements: "you said you would take out the garbage, and you have not."
E express feelings/opinions about the situation clearly: "i get frustrated when you dont do what you promised."
A ssert your wishes, ask for what you want. dont expect the other person to know what you want them to do if you dont tell them (dont expect them to read your mind). dont tell them what they "should" do: "i would like you to do what you say you are going to do."
R einforce: reward people who respond positively to you when you ask for something. sometimes it helps to reinforce people even before they respond to you, by telling them the positive effects of getting what you want or need: "i would be a lot happier and less stressed if i know you will do what you say you will," or "thankyou for being so understanding, i really appreciate it"
M indful: stay mindful. keep your focus on your objectives, and dont go off subject, or allow the other person to try and steer the conversation off course. if necessary, just keep repeating the first steps here.
A ppear confident, in your manner, tone of voice, eye contact, etc.
N egotiate: be willing to give and get, work out a compromise. offer and ask for alternate solutions. reduce your request. "turn the tables:" turn the problem over to the other person for resolution, asking for those alternate solutions.
this is called the "dear man" outline, and i was given the information from my therapist. there's also "O' dear woman: for personal persuasion", but i wont list it here. these take some practice, but really work. good luck.
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